"Jax, you never stood a chance...."

This is what mom said to me at 3:30 this morning when I bounded in the back door and she just about doubled over from the smell.  See, I heard Chloe outside and couldn't figure out why she was out there at that time of morning, pawing at the door so I had to get get everyone out of bed barking and wooing.  Mom opened the door for Chloe and she looked just terrified, foaming at the mouth and Whew! s-m-e-l-l-y!  So I ran out there to see what was up. Yuck! Big mistake.  This little black & white creature hissed at me, started stomping the ground and then squirted something out of his behind right at my face! Nasty.  Made me cough and sneeze all over (like I need more of that!)

Mom was yelling at us, dad was blocking the doorways and my hu-brothers were laughing.... so Chloe and I dodged everybody and just ran around the house.  Had to stop now and then to roll on the floors and couches to get that nasty smell off.  Mom didn't look pleased about this, but all I was trying to do is stop smelling yucky.  Mom made Chloe drink a bunch of water so she would stop spitting foamy stuff everywhere.  And then, all of the sudden, mom made us go out to the garage and stay there!  Can you believe that?  It was HOT out there.  I was not pleased, but she brought us a fan and a big bowl of water.  All I know is that I was still excited and we were stinky. What was that thing out there?

After a few minutes, mom took Chloe and I out of the garage and made us get into the bathtub.  She had mixed up a batch of baking soda, hydrogen peroxide, and a tiny bit of dish soap and scrubbed us down.  Now, I might love my pool and sprinkler, but I hate, and I mean hate, the bathtub!  Chloe just sits there like a big baby, but I try everything I can to get out of that thing.  I don't belong in there.  It's slippery.  After I made my displeasure known to everyone it was quickly over.  Mom put us both back in the garage (but I made sure to shake all that stuff off me several times as I walked through the house), and we had to stay there for quite awhile, soaking wet.  I heard my family in the house mopping floors, washing sheets (because Chloe ran straight for mom's bed and plopped down on it) banging stuff around and vacuuming floors.  Wow, is it cleaning day already?

Pretty soon dad came for us again and mom rinsed us off in the tub and got us dried off.  Not pretty.  By this time, dad thought he should just go to work and Chloe and I decided it was a good time for a zoomie session.  I don't know why she thinks she can catch me.  I can leap over the sofa quicker than she can run around it.

The last thing I remember before mom finally shut off the lights at 5:15 am was her muttering something about "incorrigible mutts."  I don't know what that means, but I had to pee and she wouldn't let me out.  Darn it.  I hate going to bed when I have to pee.